i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
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