Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
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The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
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