I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
