3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I will be naked everywhere
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize