My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
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