i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
