I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Randomize