He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
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