so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize