We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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