How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
