I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Randomize
