It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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