I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
