It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Randomize
