Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize