I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
organizing the empties. That sober.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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