I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize