It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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