everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize