im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
It's shark week go big or go home
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
