Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
