Nicole vs. Life
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Randomize
