Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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