I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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