I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
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