Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
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