I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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