Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Randomize
