Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
