i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
you traded sex for a burrito?
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize