And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
