awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize
