And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize