Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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