I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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