How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Randomize