That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
