How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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