Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
