you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Randomize
