Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
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