Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
