he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize