Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
His nipple licking is glorious
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