I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
