Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
they're like a gay fantastic four
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize
