You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Randomize