hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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