So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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