Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
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