You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
